Page 44 - Phonebox Magazine February 2010

time to get off that sofa now. Mark Stevenson Donʼt Forget!
Dobbsy’s Article
THE BUZZ
Ipromised myself that this would be the year when I would take on whatever the world threw at me and as usual set myself more goals than youʼd get from a Brazillian dream team. A month on and Iʼm absorbed in making my music, so thatʼs one down but now I must move on to my second goal - to get out more! Luckily this month The Buzz comes armed to the teeth with alternative nights out, so if you fancy yourself as a
bit of a Karaoke singer, are up for a spot of comedy or want music and comedy at the same time then youʼve come to right place. It really is
Open Mic Night
Then along came February with its promise of a slight rise in temperature, its bevy of batter in enough lemon and sugar to strike dead any diabetic who happens to look directly at it and, of course, Valentineʼs day. That special time of the year when we consider throwing our spare cash at the feet of somebody we desire or shimmying up drainpipes to woo in the classic fashion of romances from a forgotten age......
The Craufurd Arms Wolverton
We invariably choose, however, to forego the grand gestures in order to avoid looking foolish, feeling that next year might provide more of an opportune moment for us to divide and conquer. By which time weʼll almost certainly be even more tentative and world-weary, and at least a little uglier and set in our ways, with the ever deepening definition of our furrows of worry. If, on the other hand, we choose to seize the day and spend our savings on a life-sized chocolate sculpture of ourselves, to leave anonymously on the doorstep of our chosen sweetheart; thereʼs a good chance weʼll arrive to find that some other Tom, Dick or Harry (although, probably Dick) has already left a much more apt and attractive milk-choc-piece that looks suspiciously like itʼs flipping us off.....
Every Monday Night
To paraphrase the words of a famous sex addict; “People fail to realise that tomorrow is just like today, except in a little while.” We often pass over chances to speak our minds or behave as boldly and brightly as we would like, taking comfort in the thought that we will, in the future, emerge from our chrysalis of cowardice and, at some point there after, become a brave and beautiful butterfly. The truth, unfortunately though, is that rather than endowing us automatically with the wisdom to appreciate lifeʼs eternal flux and impermanence, time tends to cement
our stifling habits and has us investing too much energy in biting our lips when we should be shooting from our hips.
They say thereʼs no such thing as a second chance, which would make every passing minute a one off shot to write the story the way you want it. So ask yourself; who do you love? And is now the time to tell them? I normally notify the objects of my fascinations around midnight on a Friday and Saturday, when my phone seems to emerge from my pocket of its own volition and starts firing invitations and overloaded suggestions into the stratosphere; before I wake up the next morning feeling distinctly less emotional about the whole affair...
Anyway, however you do it, exposing the
sensitive parts of yourself and admitting that
some special someone makes you feel all
gooey inside is never easy when youʼre
supposed to be a grown up. Especially in such
a small, insular community like the one we live in, where you could count the amount of nice girls with the appropriate number of fingers and toes on two hands. Itʼs eleven. So, for those of you who wonʼt be pressing shoulders with the other lovers on this monthʼs Sunday of gushy sentiments, and will instead be testing out new electrical equipment or spending some well-earned gentlemanʼs time with the computer, weʼll
www.myspace.com/thekidwithcrowsfeet
be dedicating The Craufurd Arms Open Mic (Statford Road, Wolverton) on Monday the 15th to romantic songs of all kinds. Although, feel free to go beyond songs as weʼve had some great poetry and stand-up and are open to anything youʼve put youʼre heart into, or happen to find particularly amusing. Hereʼs wishing you all a warmer month of Rock sonics, gin and tonics, and amorous colonics.
44 Phonebox Magazine
Chris Dobbs