Page 31 - Phonebox Magazine November 2014

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Sainsbury’s
Isuppose at some point I have to bring up the huge question that has been rattling around Olney for some considerable time and that is Sainsbury’s.
Should there be an apostrophe in the name Sainsbury’s or not? Sainsburys or Sainsbury’s? Feelings are running quite high, but I would say that it’s about 75/25 in favour of the apostrophe but these things change, so we’ll keep our eyes open.
One lady I spoke to about it only the other day was far more concerned that it may be called ‘Lidl’ as she felt that not only would it bring about the collapse of the housing market, but she would have to go to MK and nick a load of Waitrose bags, to transfer her ‘Lidl’ goods into in the car park, before returning home for fear of being shunned by the neighbours. Apparently you don’t need to do all that with Sainsbury’s/Sainsburys as they are just about socially acceptable.
Not knowing about the hierarchy in the world of food shopping has put me at a disadvantage in my research. I’m sure that when I was in France a couple of years back in a production of ‘The Tempest’ we all trogged happily into Lidl every day without being abused by the locals. In hindsight, I’m just thinking that they may have been swearing at me as I’m not terribly good at French, but you can usually tell if you’re being abused in any lingo by the body language and they all seemed jolly enough. Perhaps it was the fact that I was in a Shakespeare play that gave us the credibility
and had we been in the stage production of ‘Carry On Nurse’ they’d have had us up the steps of the guillotine before we’d weighed in our onions.
It does seem to worry some people about where you shop. A Conservative friend of mine once accused me of supporting a Socialist Revolution by shopping at the Co- Op in Olney. I’d only gone in to get some tinned tomatoes. I believe the Co-Op was initially started under the original Labour values of fairness and workers rights etc, but has since embraced capitalism with some gusto, going by it’s banking procedures and the company they employ to do the bullying for car park charges.
However in my view it’s tinned tomatoes were as good as anyone else’s and it was the nearest shop.
That’s how I do my shopping when called on to get involved. What do I need? Where’s the nearest shop? How quickly can I get out of the wretched place?
One thing that always surprises me about shopping is that people are concerned about loyalty points. There’s nothing loyal about it. The prices are all set to take into consideration that some people may remember to use these coupons which last for just about the time that you wouldn’t go back to do a full shop, so they’re only getting you to spend a bit more unnecessarily and that isn’t loyalty. It’s called the hard sell. They’re just trying to get you to spend more than you really need
The Big Question David Pibworth
to. I had a loyalty card for fuel and used it for years and finally thought that I’d cash in my points and one of the ‘Specials’ I had the chance to buy was a Giant Egg Timer at half price, so I’ve become cynical about it.
My take on Sainsbury’s/Sainsburys should it come to Olney, is that it will have an apostrophe and a coffee shop and a clothing department and everything else that it says it won’t have. Not immediately you understand, they have to play the game, and it’ll be a gradual thing.
Oh, and please don’t call them ‘Supermarkets’ as it gives them a feeling of grandeur that’s unnecessary. They are not ‘Super’, they are grim, dismal places and neither are they ‘Markets’. Markets are places where you can go and get food etc without being pestered about coupons and cards and have a chat to the stall holders.
But whether it’s right or wrong I leave to others, as I’ll use it if I happen to be past there but that is the basis that I use all shops on, so my view is of little importance. My proposal for it to become a seedy jazz club was never very likely.
But I tell you what I am going to do. I’m going to ask ‘Lidl’ if I can have some of their bags and I shall sneak into the new shop and replace them on the pay out desks and watch the screaming and fainting when the customers get into the car park. I mean if you can’t have a laugh, what‘s it all about? Cheers For Now.
Phonebox Magazine 31